hadthehighground | Empatheias IC Inbox

I can't say for certain. Likely until the Enforcers decide that he is no longer a significant threat.

In my opinion, I believe he's learned his lesson. But it is not my decision to make.

Regardless of the length of time, I appreciate that you're looking out for him.

[since Obi-Wan said Ben had never attacked him, which was a good sign, and he seemed calm and level-headed enough to maybe be a good influence.]

You're most welcome, though I only wish I could do more. He's very conflicted and I am doing my best to help him.

[He hoped that with Kylo Ren, he might be able to succeed where he had failed with Anakin. He didn't want to see another Skywalker lost to the Dark Side.]

[her gratitude is something she can't hide from the connection between them, because it's reassuring to hear she's not the only one that thinks it's still possible to help Ben. Not that others not feeling the same would deter her on this--nothing really could once her mind was made up on something--but it helps her feel more secure in her opinions.]

I feel being there for him is more than enough to start with. I can't imagine what he's been through during his life, but he needs someone to listen to him that he can trust and confide in. [and unfortunately she isn't sure that person would ever be her, but that's something she won't admit. Not to Obi-Wan at least.]

[Her gratitude is felt and he's happy to know that she feels that way. Obi-Wan only wants to help after all, and having the approval of Ben's family makes that easier.]

I suppose the fact that he's willing to talk to me says something. He has no love for Jedi. Though he also entrusted his Lightsaber to me during the whole ordeal. So I can safely say progress is being made.

[Obi-Wan wouldn't leave his Lightsaber with just anyone, and he was certain Ben felt the same way. So there was a trust there. Something that he can work with.]

I have hope for him. Your son is not lost yet.

[naturally, Ben leaving his lightsaber with Obi-Wan is something she's never heard before now, and she's actually surprised by it. Leia is happy to accept Obi-Wan's assessment that it's a good sign.]

Is there anything I can do to help you, or to help him along? [she won't actually admit it, but she does feel next to useless when it came to helping Ben. She has little idea how to parent in the first place, but adding all of Ben's issues on top of it? She had no idea where to begin.]

[Obi-Wan considered this for a moment. He wasn't entirely sure of specifics at this point, but he didn't want to discourage Leia from trying.]

You are his mother. I'm certain there are ways you can reach him no one else can. Your death, I think, profoundly affected him.

[He knew Kylo Ren cared about her, no matter how much he tried to hide his affections and attachments to people. He had seen it when the young man's end was near.]

[How her death may have affected Ben isn't something Leia wants to think about. She could see the attempts to wrestle control back from the spirit possessing him, and she didn't want to know what had happened after all of that. It made it easier to move on and not dwell on her own feelings about death.]

That's not what I wanted for him. ["that" means a number of things, not just him having to watch as the spirit killed her.]

I had to try and help, though. [Sorry Obi-Wan, you opened this can, and she can't quite put a stopper on it just yet.]

[He did, didn't he? Obi-Wan would just have to go with it.]

Of course, I don't think anyone would have expected any less. I only brought it up because I think it's evident that he cares for you.

[There's more she wants to add, about how she's not sure how he actually feels based on things he's told her before, but fortunately for Obi-Wan, she's not about to share Kylo's feelings about the rebellion she's dedicated her life to just yet. Obi-Wan's comment has given her a lot to think about, and she's not comfortable enough to share more (honestly, she felt a bit foolish already for sharing what she had with him despite not really knowing him), so it was back to business--]

Regardless. You'll let me know when you have time available to help, I hope. I don't have as much to do here as I'm accustomed to, so we can surely work something out.

[Thats certainly all right, he would understand. One can not expect someone reveal all their inward thoughts and feelings after they barely knew each other.]

Yes, of course. Once I make a plan I'll send you the times I'm available and we can go from there.

[In the middle of the afternoon, after four days of searching and worry, Anakin finally shoves his way into Obi-Wan's apartment without even knocking. He looks like he's barely slept in days, running on pure emotion and caf.]

Master?

[He doesn't bother with any proper greetings, only stopping to shut the door behind him with more force than is really needed. Who cares about those kinds of things? Anakin clearly doesn't, as he's too busy being frantic and ready to leap at the smallest sign of something being off.]

I need your help. Right now.

[Obi-Wan knew that Anakin's search would be in vain. He couldn't sense Padme anymore, and he knew Anakin couldn't either. Still, he let his friend go through the motions. To do what he needed to come to terms.

Though he also knows that will be a painful process. He has a feeling though that his former apprentice will come to him, and he's not disappointed. Though it hadn't quite expected it so abruptly.

Obi-Wan's kitten, Satine, hurries out of the way as Anakin barges in. The older Jedi had been doing dishes and looked up calmly. On any other occasion he might have scolded him for not knocking, but not today.]

What is it, Anakin?

[Anakin barely looks at the cat, though he might feel bad about startling it later. Right now, his full focus is on Obi-Wan (doing something as mundane as dishes during such a major crisis, how ridiculous) and any answers he might have.]

Do you know where Padmé is? I haven't seen her in days, and I can't feel her anywhere, but I thought you might be able to.

[This might be his very last hope, and he's clinging desperately to it. Deep down, part of him is already expecting this hope to be crushed, but he still has to try. He tells himself it's for her sake, but that's only half true. He just can't let go of her that easily.]

[Obi-Wan was silent for a few moments, looking at his friend with a quiet pity. He dried his hands on a towel before stepping away from the dishes to go to Anakin.]

No, I can't.

[Obi-Wan knew that people could come and go. He's heard of it. But this is the first time someone he knew had disappeared. Padme's disappearance had only one conclusion. While Obi-Wan had already accepted it, Anakin clearly hasn't.]

[If Leia were being honest, there was something that had been nagging at her in the back of her mind since her fight and final real conversation with Padme. Namely, the subject of the fight itself, which really only served to help fuel her intense hatred, fear, and overall rejection of Anakin as a person and his relation to her. She doesn't care about Anakin, nor does she want to know how his mind works, but there's a disconnect between the Anakin Padme claims exists and Darth Vader, and Leia truly doesn't understand how that could happen (because clearly there must have been something buried underneath that she neglected to mention before their fight).

Padme would have been the one to ask, probably, given how well she knew Anakin, but Padme was gone now, and asking Luke would no doubt only lead to questions about seeing the light in their father. And she didn't really want to fight with Luke about that. So that leaves Obi-Wan as the only real logical choice.]

I'd like to talk with you. In person, or over the crystal, I don't mind either way.

[her tone, while pleasant, is diplomatic and to the point. That was the easier way to approach this subject, if you asked her.]

[A part of Anakin feels like it's dying at those words, and his face crumbles in pain as he absorbs it.]

Would you try again? One more time.

[He's not ready to give up. There's no other choice, but he can't let go on his own. It's his fatal flaw, and it's especially obvious right now, when he's so desperate.]

Please.

[His voice cracks in the middle of the word, and he puts one hand over his face as he tries to pull it together. He might as well not have bothered, because his composure has fled and his stability is looking like it's about to follow.]

Anakin...

[His voice is soft and sad. He already knows the answer, but stops himself from saying so. The pain and anguish he feels from his friend is difficult to bear.

Reaching out, Obi-Wan tries to place a hand on Anakin's shoulder. A comforting gesture but more than that.]

Let's try together.

[Anakin's bond with Padme would be stronger than Obi-Wan's own. If anyone could sense her it would be him. But it was well known that if Jedi combine their efforts it would be stronger and reach farther.]

I'm in Shaarnath right now. So unless you're here as well, it will have to be over the crystal.

[Fortunately, Obi-Wan has settled down in some shade somewhere and was getting a drink. It was hot here, and dry, so water breaks were a must. So he had time to indulge Leia in whatever it was she wanted to talk about.]

I'm not, unfortunately.

[Crystal it is, then. At least with the crystal, it was easier to keep her voice level and calm, even if it would be largely an illusion. She knows full well she can't trust herself to stay calm in actuality with what she wants to discuss with Obi-Wan.]

I want to discuss Darth Vader.

[sorry to ruin your nice desert vacation, Obi-Wan.]

[There's a long pause on Obi-Wan's end as he weighs the gravity of her request. Darth Vader... is not an easy subject for him to talk about. And he knows it isn't for Leia either.]

What would you like to know?

[Her voice, thanks to the wonders of telepathy, comes through calm, albeit stilted, but there's no mistaking the emotions that come through with her words. She can't mask it, as much as she wants to, because everything about Darth Vader is still and she thinks always will be like an open wound. It was bad enough when he was just a looming, menacing symbol of the Empire, but learning his relation to her made everything infinitely worse.]

Before she left, Padme and I had a... discussion. [it was an argument really, and it was easy enough to figure out the alternative meaning of "discussion" based on the strong feeling of guilt and sadness accompanying it. But those feelings fizzle out, toward the usual anger and hatred reserved mostly for Vader and the Empire.]

I would like to know how someone she believes is kind and caring can turn into something capable of watching unflinchingly as a planet home to billions of beings, including people he once knew, is destroyed in front of his eyes.

[among, you know, everything else she'd suffered at the hand of Darth Vader.]

[Again there was a few moments of hesitation. Leia cut right to the point, and it was difficult to come up with a good answer.]

That's a difficult question.

[He admits this easily. But really he's reeling from the idea that something like this happened. He doesn't know about the Death Star, or the millions of voices that are suddenly silenced. Not yet. But he does know about the Jedi purge. The children that were slain at Darth Vader's hand.]

Anyone can be capable of great good, or great evil. It is how we live and the decisions we make that shape who we become.

[There's a pause but he continues.]

In Anakin's case, he did make some poor decisions, but he was also influenced by someone. For years, right under our noses.

[To Leia, Obi-Wan's attempts at discussing this in a more vague sense, talking about anyone being capable of great good or great evil, is just a stalling attempt. She wants an actual explanation, not a discussion about the complex natures of humans. And as far as she's concerned, even though he spared Luke, all Anakin is capable of is great evil.]

To be influenced by someone to that extent, there had to be something resembling those feelings there to begin with.

[which she's convinced of, and partially why she's uncomfortable with Anakin himself. Luke may have seen the light in his darkness, but looking at him here, all Leia sees is the looming darkness underneath whatever light he wants to pretend he has.]

[Leia was looking for a cut and dry response, when there really wasn't one.]

We all have those feelings to some extent. Anakin was certainly not born evil, no more than anyone else.

[While it might be stalling a bit, and its not entirely what she wants to hear. Obi-Wan felt the point needed to be made just the same.]

I can't say there weren't signs. There were. And I didn't act on them as I should have. But if you're looking for a reason or person to blame for the creation of Darth Vader, there isn't just one.

Empatheias IC Inbox

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8/6-ish, action, Obi-Wan's apartment

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Voice; 8/11ish I guess?

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