hadthehighground | Empatheias IC Inbox

[Letting out a shaky breath, Obi-Wan tried to compose himself. He always tried to have a handle on his emotions, even though he was working to embrace them more in this world.]

No. I believe that would actually be easier.

[It hurt, and he felt terrible for saying it. But it was the truth.]

We have had some... irreconcilable differences.

[Huh. Well THAT was a surprise. That would be EASIER? This does sound bad. The grief was still there, and those words sounded like his heart was hurt. Ahsoka tapped her chin, looking over her teas, looking for the right one.]

I have noticed that all Masters and their Apprentices tend to have... differences. At some point of another. Still, this sounds rather deep.

Would you like to talk? I'm making tea. And even if you don't want to talk, I'll bring some to you if you wish.

We were certainly no different.

[Obi-Wan had certainly had his fair share of arguments with his master. Some rather big ones too. But this was... different.]

I think I would like that, actually.

But this is different.

[The way she said it wasn't a question. It was a statement of what she was feeling from him. A moment of understanding. She choose a tea of a calming nature, and mixed it with another like it but with a bit of warmth and love. She was the kind to find teas that did not alter one's emotions when drinking it, but simply offered a bit of the feeling to help one relax.]

[These were some of her favorites.]

I will be up in a couple of minutes then.

[And he would hear her after a couple of minutes, coming up the steps.]

[And just before she got there, the door to his room would open just a little bit, seemingly on his own. An invitation for Ahsoka to come in.

She would find him in a chair, in the corner, by a window. The man looking as melancholy as he had felt through the connection. Slightly slumped with shoulders drooping, and fungus dotting the wooden floor boards.

As soon as Anakin’s former Padawan came in, he looked up at her with a weak attempt at a smile. Reaching out to take the tea she had brought.]

Thank you.

[She had two large mugs of tea, carefully nudging the door open with a hip, and closing it completely as she came in. Obi-wan, please. Seated by a window and this sad looking? This must really be bad.]

[She handed him the tea and moved to settle on her knees and shins near by, seated on the floor, a hand reaching out to pluck a few mushrooms.]

Anytime. I noticed the abnormal amount of mushrooms and thought something must be up. I'm thinking of trying to make a wild mushroom and rice soup later.

[She said it with a small smile, as if to bring a bit of light to the room.]

[He did look rather pathetic didn’t he? But well... it really was that bad. He wasn’t even sure yet what he was going to say to Anakin about the ordeal. He was still processing it himself.

But for the moment he just breathed in the scent of the tea and took a sip. Letting it warm him from the inside. The tea instantly making him relax a little, enough to get a flicker of amusement at Ahsoka’s words.]

I have a few recipes if you would like them.

[Ah, there we go. If he hadn't got any amusement at all from that comment, she would have known her work was cut out for her. Still, she gave him a small sly smile, then nodded.]

Of course you have mushroom recipes. I remember when I was younger there used to be a lot of mushrooms around. I almost thought I imagined it. You've been doing so well in hiding them.

[She sipped from her mug, reaching a finger out to push one little mushroom over, popping it from it's stem to roll near her knee.]

So, I was worried when I saw so many. Something has happened between you and Master Jinn?

[There was a long silence from Obi-Wan. His eyes turning down to his cup as he watched the steam rise from the dark liquid. It would take some explaining, and he knew this. Best to start from the beginning he supposed.]

This has been going on for some time now, actually.

You were not here for it, but Anakin made an emotional outburst over the amulets during an incident where emotions were being affected. I was incapacitated at the time though so I didn’t see it.

[He was a bit dismissive about that part as they were merely details leading up to the real issue.]

Leia took this as a threat and made a public announcement regarding Anakin. Informing everyone of what he would become and warning them of the danger he posed.

[Here we go. There was a lot she missed, but where she didn't want to talk about the time period she left from, they hadn't spoken about a lot of what she missed while gone. Looks like she was going to learn a few things.]

[Her brow raised as he explained the emotional outburst during an emotionally affected problem. She's not at all surprised that Anakin had an outburst. And if Obi-wan was incapacitated, and she wasn't here? That left very few to help him.]

[She had just taken another sip of her tea when he mentioned what Leia had done. For a moment she choked on her sip, covering her mouth and sitting the mug down on the floor. She cleared her throat before looking over to him with wide blue eyes.]

A public announcement? About his future? That...

[She was about to say that it seemed a little unfair, but she could also understand that fear and do a lot to push people. She frowned instead.] That is unfortunate. And all because of an outburst? He's not the man he becomes back home. He's... different here. Happier.

An announcement like that could not have helped matters...

[Obi-Wan couldn’t help but grimace at her initial reaction, but Ahsoka seemed to compose herself rather quickly.]

Indeed, though Vader is all Leia has known and she refuses to see otherwise.

I tried to reason with her, but she would not have any of it. She stubbornly clings to her perceptions with anger and hatred.

Anakin did not take it well at first, but instead of letting it drag him down he has risen above it. And I am proud of him for that.

[She seemed to be thinking. Considering it over. There was a lot to take in and she hadn't got all of it yet.]

Fear can do a lot to a person, and in the time I am from, and Leia, from what I gather, Darth Vader is a name that strikes fear in many people. The Emperor has done quite a number on our Anakin. For that I am not surprised that she can't see past it. For her to fall to anger and hate and hold onto it so firmly? That feels a bit concerning.

It is too bad she can not find tolerance while here. He is not the man he became back home. Would it not be better to help him while he is here instead of push him away?

[She spoke calmly, watching the mans face for reactions or insight. She frowned, trying to piece together why this involved Master Jinn though.]

[There was a nod of agreement from Obi-Wan. He wouldn’t at all dispute what Ahsoka was saying. Far from it actually.]

While I haven’t seen what Leia has, I have experienced what Anakin becomes.

[He was certainly not blind to it.]

He does terrible things. She had told me of them, and how he has personally hurt her in her time. I too can not hold her feelings against her. However, it’s as you said, Anakin is not that man.

I’ve told her of his progress, but she refuses to believe it without seeing for herself. And yet she refuses to even speak with him in a civil manner.

[He sighed softly, exasperated and saddened by all of this.]

I do not seem to be credible in her eyes as I have not done enough to restrain Anakin to her liking. Nor have I expressed willingness to take certain measures should Anakin get.., out of hand.

Master Qui-Gon, however, has agreed to do so. He has decided to support Leia’s stance in regards to Anakin.

[She honestly can understand Leia's anger towards Darth Vader. From the times she has seen the Princess while working around Bail, she knew for a fact that she had a stubborn head about her. Very strong willed. It reminded her of Bail, yes, but more so...Anakin.]

[She knows a lot of the terrible things VADER has done, but Ahsoka is of the opinion that Vader is not Anakin, and Anakin is not Vader. Not really.]

It is very disappointing that she would let her fear and hate control her like that. I would have hoped she was stronger than that, but she has been through a lot. You can't please everyone, Obi-wan, though I am sure that is also a great disappointment to you too.

[It was that last part that surprised her most in all this. She looked at the other with a questioning look. She had never known Master Jinn, of course. Maul took him away from the Order around the time that Master Plo Koon had found her. She had heard great stories however. The rogue of the Jedi in some ways. Toeing that line every step of the way.]

But wasn't Master Jinn the one responsible for finding Anakin in the first place?

It is, though you are right. I can’t change Leia’s mind, and I certainly don’t intend to try. I can only present her with what I know and let her make her own conclusions. But... I could not turn a blind eye as she publicly smeared Anakin.

[It had been too much, and she had gone too far, even if she believed she was doing the right thing.]

Yes, he was. And he would have trained him had he survived to do so. With our without the consent of the council I suspect. He had great hopes in Anakin.

[She wrapped her hands around her mug, holding it close for a moment. The drink was already more cool than she liked, but still calming and comfortable. It was clear she was taking every word into consideration.]

I believe I would have been the same, had I seen it. Anakin wears his heart on his sleeve for all to see. When hes moved, he's moved very strongly. He's... protective. Especially those he feels he has to protect. [She smiled faintly about it though, remembering several times when she saw him upset over one person or another. Or his relief when she was returned to him.] If she's scared of what he can do, it might have been better to take it privately.

Taking it publicly seems like it would only spread resentment and fear. [A pause, then she gave a soft smile.] But I suppose it also shows him who his true friends and allies are. Those willing to see past it and continue to befriend him.

It is a shame that even Master Jinn can't see past the pain to help. The stories of him made him sound as if he would defy the Force if he was given the chance. Surely he's seen that Anakin wants to change the future, hasn't he?

Yes, I agree. Though she seemed to have felt it was right to warn everyone.

[Something Obi-Wan certainly didn’t agree with, and he made it known. Her soft smile though was mirrored by his own.]

You do have a point, I suppose.

I’m not certain how Master Qui-Gon could have missed it if he hasn’t. Anakin has been very vocal about that for some time now. I really don’t know why he has chosen this path.

Edited 2018-01-24 06:19 (UTC)

Perhaps if he was storming the streets swinging his lightsaber around and killing people, that might have been reasonable. There isn't much to be done about it now however. The damage is done. The best we can do is help when we can, and keep reminding him to control his temper when it comes up.

[She gave the man a sad smile though. Poor Obi-wan. She'll try to help and make sure he isn't alone in all this.]

Perhaps... it is a test. [She said of Master Jinn. She understands now why there was such grief coming from Obi-wan though. To have your master choose to work against you or even not work with you at all has to be heartbreaking.] Perhaps a test to see how you both have got on without him. If he can straighten his act up on his own.

It's not a very... heartfelt test, but perhaps he needs to see how his apprentices can grow, or have grown without him?

[There was a moment of genuine consideration at that. But the more he thought about it, the more he doubted it. He may have agreed had this not been so ongoing, but well. He shook his head.]

As much I would like to believe that, I don't think so.

[He sighed quietly as he sat back in his chair and took another sip of tea.]

We have tried talking about this a few times, and even Anakin has approached him with little success. I never would have thought we would have been so divided like this.

[It was worth the thought, but she also had to consider that Qui-gon was not the only one testing him. Instead of saying that out loud though, she held it to herself, simply giving a feeling of understanding when he said he didn't think so.]

The last time either of you two saw Master Jinn, you were both young. And he has not been around to watch how the times have changed and progressed. Perhaps you are seeing him how he truly is, or perhaps for him you two have both changed and he hasn't had the time to understand why.

That does feel like the trouble with this timeline issue we all have. There have been a lot of changes, and many people have yet to see them, or will never see them.

[It's not her taking a side here, and she isn't trying to give advice. It's more a moment of offering other thoughts or ideas that could be thought upon. to see if there really is something to explain the differences and moods.]

[Fortunately, Obi-Wan took Ahsoka's words for what they were. What she said made sense, even to his somewhat irrational thoughts that were decidedly emotional. So he nodded in quiet agreement.]

I've begun to think the same, actually. My point of view then, and now, is very different.

Even so, it's hard to believe that the man who believed so strongly in Anakin, who intended to train him no matter what, would take the position he has.

I've been doing my best to understand, and yet I find it difficult.

Edited 2018-01-30 15:50 (UTC)

[She let out a bit of a sigh, hand still fiddling with her tea cup as he spoke. There wasn't much else she could think of to ponder over. It felt like a difficult issue that she thankfully didn't know herself.]

I can't even begin to understand how difficult this has to be for you. I've had the good fortune to be able to reunite with Two Masters that I hold in such high respect, and still feel as if they know me and understand me. And I of them.

To regain having your master around again only to feel like you have lost him must be a terrible pain. [She reached out to rest a hand at his knee, giving it a small squeeze, and apologetic look given as well.]

I will hold out hope for the two of you. That something bends and mends.

[Obi-Wan's tea was starting to get cold at this point, which was only confirmed as he took another sip. He then set it aside with a sigh. Her words brought a small smile though.]

Thank you, Ahsoka.

[He then shook his head a bit in self doubt.]

I can't help but wonder though, if I've done the right thing. None of it feels right, except with Anakin, and I'm torn as a result.

[Taking in a breath, he then let it out again.]

I've decided to put some distance between Master Jinn and I. It's for the best, I believe. At least for the time being.

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